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  #6571  
Old 04-10-2017, 12:22 AM
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how excited I am for this upcoming week (if everything works out!)
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  #6572  
Old 04-10-2017, 01:13 AM
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My mom was talking to my cousin about me about a couple of things I do. She was venting mostly and I had to hear about it. Then earlier today, my sister gave me some shoes to wear (for Disneyland) and I jokingly said that they smelled a little bad and my mom had to fucking chime in and say, "Don't even talk because your boots...." and my sister agreed. My cousin just laughed. A bit later, my birthday was mentioned (going to Disneyland is my birthday) and my sister was shocked that I was turning 26. I just shrugged and kept on watching Mrs.Doubtfire.

I get that that's how families interact and they're made to humiliate but god x.x I felt like I couldn't breathe and I became anxious. Then somehow, it turned into depression on the way back home. Then entering my brother's house, I felt pressured to help my mom, getting out of the car and then to help my brother out with the bags we brought with us. Only to find out that my mom didn't need any help at all and my brother didn't either. I felt helpless and worthless. And there is no one that I can really talk to about this. I don't really want my brother or anyone know I'm feeling this way. They won't understand and if I explain my feelings, they'll wonder what the fuck I'm talking about and/or start venting about things I don't do correctly or things I SHOULD be doing. I just have to hold it in and hope like hell that I'll feel better tomorrow.

Other thoughts I'm having tonight:

I got all dolled up for absolutely nothing on Saturday. My sister said that it was my cousin's birthday and I made an effort to get all dolled up (to make myself feel better after a crappy week) and nothing happened. Plus, painfully aware that I was 25 and COULD BE out there, having the time of my life with lovely women but nope. Instead, I was stuck with my family. Whatever :/

Edit: One more thought.

I always wondered why I have one earphone plugged in while everyone is talking and the one time, I made an effort to be more....present....they fucking complain about me. Looks like I got my answer. For now on, I'm keeping an earphone in, listening to music. It's safer......
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Last edited by Plague Kitty; 04-10-2017 at 01:24 AM.
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  #6573  
Old 04-10-2017, 02:20 AM
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Adulting sucks. :/
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  #6574  
Old 04-10-2017, 12:15 PM
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If my orders will arrive this week
I really, really hope so!!! Would be so nice to get it right before my bday
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  #6575  
Old 04-10-2017, 02:03 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Chimera Doll View Post
If my orders will arrive this week
I really, really hope so!!! Would be so nice to get it right before my bday
Hope it arrives before your birthday (massacre).

If that person has PayPal so I can ship that item to them.
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  #6576  
Old 04-10-2017, 07:14 PM
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^ thank you!

Thinking about: the one order I want sooo badly! Also GW2 and the things I need to accomplish on there
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  #6577  
Old 04-11-2017, 01:34 AM
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Thinking about things.



We were supposed to hang out next week but then Scarlet texted me that it was in the middle of May that she was going to come to Los Angeles, to see me. And not only that. She was bringing along her boyfriend. Her. Boyfriend. THIS IS OUR FIRST MEETING AND SHE'S BRINGING ALONG HER BOYFRIEND?!?!? Um, I became friends with her. Not her fucking boyfriend. I'm sure he's a great guy (I keep seeing her disgusting ass Facebook posts about "I'm so happy in this relationship!" and wedding dresses and wedding cakes, all lovey dovey-I had to unfollow her because I was going to go insane! x.x) and everything but no. I want to meet HER first and then the boyfriend can be introduced to me. That is the appropriate thing to do to someone! Not what she's doing. Forcing me to meet him as well during our first meeting. One person at a time, please! Like, I get if it was her brother or something. Because it's family and you're not going to say no to family. I'm bringing my sister along. That's acceptable. But a significant other to a complete stranger? During your first meeting? Just to fucking disgust me with your "I love you! Look at this California sunset! Awwwwwwwwwww, how romantic, babe!" and you know what will happen? She'll probably have ME take the picture as they kiss with the ocean in the background.

Like, what am I supposed to do in that situation? Do this?



"Oh, I'm so honored to be the single person in this couple thing you've been throwing in my face all day long!"



Ugh. Just the thought of it is making me want to barf. I'm not even kidding. Who wants to be the single person during a couple's retreat? I'm not saying they talk like this but who the fuck wants to be around this all day, "Babe! Look at that! Babe, I want one! Buy me one! BABE! BABE! BABE! BABE! BABE!". Whoooooooooooooooooooo! *Getting pissed off*

Like I said. I became her friend. Not her boyfriend. Maybe he can be introduced to me in the second or maybe third meeting. But the first? I'd say she's fucking crazy if she thinks she's going to get away with that shit. I barely fucking know her. I barely know how we're going to act once we meet and she's bringing ANOTHER person? That's too much for me. I'm sorry but I'm not going to meet her in the middle of May OR go with her to go see TBM. And I honestly don't give a fuck if she bought the tickets already. She can invite someone else. And I'm not gonna suck it up and tolerate it either. I don't have to be forced into that situation.
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Last edited by Plague Kitty; 04-11-2017 at 03:34 AM.
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  #6578  
Old 04-12-2017, 12:47 AM
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I need to go listen to my Milla playlist.

Especially Dance While I'm Drowning.
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  #6579  
Old 04-12-2017, 01:00 AM
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I really need to get started her forum signatures.....

Also, I doubt I'm going to get some sleep. I woke up at 5pm x.x
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  #6580  
Old 04-12-2017, 01:35 AM
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how messed up this all is and how my annoyance and anger is probably just a sign I still care. Of course I do.. -.-
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  #6581  
Old 04-12-2017, 02:32 AM
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I'm finally back to making signatures. The motivation is back!
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  #6582  
Old 04-12-2017, 05:14 PM
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Finally feeling quite a bit better with my sickness so time to be productive. Also finally making more progress on the TBM font thread and then I need to focus on Photoshop and do what I've been wanting to do for like a decade...

Procrastination is such a bitch!
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  #6583  
Old 04-13-2017, 12:37 AM
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What the fuck I'm going to wear to Disneyland next week and what magazine to buy in two weeks.
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  #6584  
Old 04-13-2017, 09:29 PM
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Why my love life likes to tease me with a potentially great partner before shitting on the idea.
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  #6585  
Old 04-13-2017, 10:55 PM
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What the fuck made me want to look up a chat room earlier this morning? O.o I dodged 20 messages from men wanting to....yeah. And then 10 messages from people who should seriously be locked up in a mental hospital. To top it off and what really drained my energy (to the point where I thought my brain was going to melt) was this one fucking Energizer bunny type troll who had a fucking problem with my Persephone username and proceeded to rant (I just silently lurked in the shadows and watched her write her retarded shit, just for my own amusement) about me.

She called me an attention whore, a lesbian whore, a dyke bitch, a hypocrite (I don't know what for though). Then she started saying these things that were supposed to hurt me, I guess? "No wonder with that ugly face, you don't get any p****!", "We all know why you're here! You're here to go muffin-diving with fake women that tell you how 'hot' you are! I bet you ___ ___ on that shit!" and "Ask yourself something. Do you know why there's 20 seconds of silence after you enter a room? You know, the lesbians in the lesbian chat room all think you're a weirdo!".

Me the entire time, "Yeah, yeah, yeah, keep talking. Oh, look! Look where I'm putting all the zero fucks I give!"



Ahahahahaha, go fuck yourself with a screwdriver! Wentworth style, bitch! That is all I have to say on that. It's just laughable. "My face is so ugly, I don't get any" Oooooookay! Forget the part where it's ultimately my decision who I choose to give myself to. At 26 years old and not 19, with a sleazy username like you.
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Last edited by Plague Kitty; 04-14-2017 at 12:10 AM.
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